Author Archives: katherine

About katherine

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A Woman’s Place

Chances are as soon as you read that title you finished the saying. You see them all over Pinterest and etsy these days.

A woman’s place is…
… in the House and Senate.
… in the resistance.
… in the kitchen.

Well, excuse my language, but I’ve decided I like the more universal saying that a woman’s place? Is wherever the fuck she wants it to be.

Whether real or imagined, I am so sick of women thinking there is some sort of competition for “most womanly” or “most feminist.” I’m sick of women feeling marginalized for choosing “just” to be a stay at home mom. I’m sick of women feeling judged for pursuing a career – and loving it.

I have the privilege of being a part of a Lean-In Circle where I get the opportunity to have lunch with some amazingly smart, accomplished, and motivated women in my community. We get to talk about equality in the workplace, taking a seat at the table, etc. One month, the topic was success.

It’s easy to become overwhelmed with impostor syndrome when you’re sitting at a table with so many impressive women… I’m sure many of them make more money than me… Some probably drive fancier cars… Have bigger houses… Take more vacations… Others have more impressive titles.

The other thing that happens with you’re sitting at a table with so many impressive women, is that you are surrounded by uplifting, empowering, motivating women who are all on the same page with what success means.

And that is that it means something different to each and every one of us. And that’s ok. And that definition can (and will) change. And that’s ok too. We all have a place.

I’m lucky enough to be surrounded by people that support me where I’m at. And everywhere I’ve been along the way. Wherever my “place” happened to be at that time. My definition of success has changed a number of times over the years, and so my “place” has changed as well.

I’ve been sitting on this draft for months. Last week the world celebrated International Women’s Day and I’ll be damned if a YouTube ad from Google didn’t get me all inspired to dust this off and finish it. My goal is to make a conscious effort to support women where they stand. Whether they’re happy where they are and they’d consider themselves a success, or a work in progress as they work toward their goals.

I have two little ladies that will one day grow up to be women. Right now, one of them wants to be an engineer and design bows for archery and hunting. The other wants to be a mom. No matter where their paths in life take them, I want them to know that their place is wherever they want it to be.

A Traveling Working Mom’s Rant – Some things never change

Back when I blogged regularly, and while I was also contributing to a blog all about being a working mom – you know, back when I had two kids not three. And my now 5 and a half-year-old middle child was my 3-month-old youngest child – I wrote a blog post all about how maddening it is to be a working mom and get the comments about “how hard it must be” and “who is taking care of the kids.”

Well, fast-forward five years. We’ve added another kid to the mix and I now have a job where I work remote and travel fairly often. That blog has been long-since shut down, but I just stumbled upon the original post I wrote, and I have to say that I am unpleasantly surprised and how much things have not changed.

Since I took my very first work trip away as a mother, when my now almost 10-year-old was 3 months old, and literally every single trip since, at some point before, during or after my trip, I’m asked, “so who’s watching your kid(s) while you’re away?”

It’s come from women. It’s come from men. It’s come from executives. It’s come from fellow parents.

Then when I tell them that the kids at home with their dad, their jaws drop. Disbelief written all over their faces. Every time.

It boggles my mind that people assume that just because I’m the mom and I’m traveling that I must have left the kids with my mother or my sister or my mother in law or some other capable woman. That my husband can’t handle parenting the kids by himself or be bothered to leave work in time to pick our kids up before daycare closes.

My most recent trip was the worst I’ve heard it in a while. I was gone for back-to-back trade shows for a total of 15 days. It was brutal. For all of us. Two days in Vegas is too long, let alone two weeks. I had never been away from the kids or him for that long. I was exhausted. He was exhausted. We all missed each other.

People were unrelenting. The moment they heard how long I was going to be gone they immediately asked a) Do you have kids? followed quickly by b) Who is taking care of them while you are away?

Why is it so hard to believe that my husband, my childrens’ FATHER, is taking care of his kids while I’m out of town. It not only pisses me off, I take offense to it on his behalf.

I get that he’s not the norm when it comes to things like this. I remember one time, after returning home from a trip I took when Reese was a few months old, he told me (“no offense”) it was kind of nice to have me gone because it meant he got to do more with the baby.

My job is just as important as his job. And likewise, our children are just as important to him as they are to me. We are in this parenting gig together. That means we both juggle schedules, make sacrifices accordingly. As a team. When he has to work late, that means I’m on pick up and dinner duty and sometimes even bedtime duty solo. And when I travel, he jumps in and does the same. No hesitation.

Dads can be active parents too. Why is that so hard for people to understand/believe/accept!?

End rant.

The title of my first book.

I rarely read books. When I do, they are typically memoir or biographical non-fiction types. Most of the ones I have picked up recently have been very easy, finish in a 4-hour plane ride, reads. As I read them, I find myself thinking, “oh I could totally write a book.” But then I also think, “I am clearly not a celebrity with an interesting “how I got here” life. I’m not a parenting expert. I’m not any kind of subject-matter expert when it comes to marketing. What the hell would I even write a book about!?”

And while that’s totally true, I still recently found myself thinking of theoretical book pitches.

Title: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ – Mostly Average Accounts of the World’s OKAYest Mom.
Book Type: Parenting
Synopsis: This one seems like the easiest and most obvious. A collection of short stories, mostly previously published here on this blog:

With other stories about how I’ll never be a Pinterest-worthy mom:

  • We celebrate National Donut Day! … a day late. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
  • I remembered to take photos on the first day of school! … a day late. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
  • I set up the annual Advent Activity calendar on December First! … but instead of in the morning when they wake up, it’s after they get home from school. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯



Title: Fake it till you make it.
Book Type: career
Synopsis: Nothing really that original. A collection of advice I’ve been given or seen on the internet, followed by stories of how I’ve applied them in my career and how they have helped (or hindered) my career.

  • Shift your language – Appreciation instead of apologies. “I appreciate your patience.” vs. “So sorry I am late.
  • Dress for the job you want, not the job you have. Unless you work in an office and your goal is to be a stripper. Maybe don’t do that.
  • A woman’s place – isn’t in the house or senate or kitchen or resistance. It’s wherever the hell she wants it to be.
  • Defining success – Success can look like different things to different people. Identify what it looks like to you. Are you there yet? If not, keep working at it. If you are, does it feel like success? If yes, awesome and good for you! If not, that’s ok. Redefine, make changes and keep working.


Title: Only 3 Minutes Late
Book Type: General self-help
Synopsis: Tips for creating work-life balance. Some tips may include:

  • Meal planning: a guide
  • A well-timed growl-yell can really help “motivate” (AKA: scare) your kids into getting out the door in a more expeditious manner.
  • How to say no.
  • Don’t marry someone that’s lazy/thinks that you doing the majority of the housework while maintaining a career is just something that women should do.
  • Go to your kids’ school family luncheons. And take work calls on the drive. Then sit in the car in the parking lot of the school while the call warps up. Then show up to the luncheon 3 minutes late.


Title: I don’t math well.
Book Type: Parenting/advice
Synopsis: Tips on parenting your academically gifted child.
Excerpt: Your kid has been identified as academically gifted! Neat! Mine has been too. But, me? I’m nowhere near as smart as her. Contained within this book are tried and true tips for parenting your gifted child. Let’s get started.

  1. Active listening – this will make you look less stupid while your kid is talking about what they learned in math that day and you’re silently trying to figure out what the hell they are even saying.
  2. Honesty – it’s always the best policy. “I have no idea what you are talking about.” or “I didn’t even learn that stuff when I was in college, so …” And also? They already know you have no idea what they’re talking about, so there’s no use in trying to pretend.
  3. Respond – “Ask your dad.” “Ask Siri.” and “Google it.” tend to be my go-to’s.
  4.    …

Actually, that’s it. The rest of the book would be blank. Good luck!


Welp, there are 4 different potential books I could knock out in my spare time. Now, where do I sign my literary agent!?

New Year’s Resolutions from the World’s OKAYest Mom

It’s about this time of year that my social media feeds start filling with “choosing your word” for the year and “thinking big” and “making goals” etc. etc. I’ve never been one for making resolutions, but this year, I figured why the heck not?

1– Limit my coffee to a half a pot a day. Unless I’m super tired. Or unless I have a headache. Or unless work is really busy. Or unless we have a lot going on.

2– Keep up on the girls’ reading logs – Having the one that can actually read, read books to the one that can’t – it counts, right? Two-fer!

3– Send PB&J in school lunches twice a week max – alternatives could include cold hot dogs, waffles & sausage, and leftover mac-n-cheese.

4– Exercise every day. 5 days a week. 3 days a week. Well… more often than I am now. Which is nothing.

5– Cherise every moment! Unless the kids are fighting. Or unless I’m tired. Or unless I’m stressed out.

6– Yell less. Unless the kids are fighting. Or unless I’m stressed out. Or unless we are running late. Or unless the kids aren’t listening.

7– Sleep more. Who am I kidding? That’s one I never have a problem with!

Cheers to a year that’s happy and healthy and to sticking to those resolutions!



Cheers nonetheless!

On hard work and helping others

Dear Rylee,

There are times, as a parent, that you can’t help but stop and realize how proud of your kids you are. As you grow up, I seem to have these little moments with you more and more.

Some of my favorite time spent with you is when it’s just the two of us in the car. It doesn’t happen very often, but when it does our conversations are some I hope I never forget.

I don’t think either of us realized that our seemingly casual conversation in early November about would morph into a full-family community service project. But I am so glad it did.

We were talking about our upcoming Advent Activity tradition. You were asking me what kind of activities we would have this year. As we talked about the activities we always have on there – getting the Christmas tree, decorating the house, etc. – we also talked about the service-oriented projects I try to include. Like the S.A.N.T.A. project and the community food bank. You mentioned that you wished you, Reese, and Linc could have more than $10 each to spend for each activity so you could buy more food and better toys.

Somewhere in there, I made a suggestion of figuring out how to turn that $60 into more. And that’s how the wreath-making fundraiser was born. You said, “what if we make some extra wreaths and sell them?

I guess you figured since we make Christmas wreaths the day after Thanksgiving anyway, what was a few more? I made a quick post on Facebook that night and started getting comments.

We spent the entire weekend clipping greens, wrapping wreath rings, making bows. For the first time you got to yield the hot glue gun and you styled and decorated nearly every wreath completely by yourself. Reese helped out here and there – she had fun learning to use the nippers. And your brother was just excited to play outside for hours on end.

You didn’t complain once about being tired or bored or cold. All in all, we made 22 wreaths, 3 candy canes, and 7 swags – earning $500 to be used for buying toys and food for our little town!

Actually, I just lied. You did complain. About my choice Christmas music. :)

Your brother and sister may still be a too young yet to truly grasp the magnitude of what your idea meant for our community, but I know you understood. And I think that’s what drove you to work as hard as you did.

I hope you never forget how excited you were every time a new order came in for a wreath. How excited you were to add up how much money you’d earned. How diligently you added up everything that was placed in the cart to ensure you didn’t spend too much. How you beamed with pride every time you told someone about your project. How kids at your school stopped and stared when we made the deliveries to the school. And most importantly, how hard you worked to fulfill those orders.

So back to those moments that make a parent stop in their tracks? This whole project was one of those moments for me. I am so, so proud of you, Kid.

You have always had heart for helping others and I hope that never changes. I can’t wait to see the positive changes you make in this world, my girl. You are going to move mountains.