I normally like to keep things light hearted around these parts, so this is not an easy thing for me to put out there. I’m one blessed wife mama lady…I know that. But there’s something that’s been happening lately that I just can’t shake off.

What’s the saying? Actions speak louder than words? Well, if that’s the case, these days it seems like Rylee hates me.

In her eyes, I can do nothing right. NOTHING.

Just last weekend at lunch, apparently the chips I gave her were too big. {THE CHIPS WERE TOO BIG!}

If I didn’t hear what she said, and I have to ask “what?” she freaks out angry with me.

She threatened to throw her grapes at me once because I had the audacity to ask her two times if she wanted blackberries. {Seriously people…whiskey, tango, foxtrot.}

It makes me sad and mad and frustrated all at the same time. I’m nearly at my wit’s end.

It’s getting to the point where I almost dread it just being the girls and me. I hate it.

It’s hard. I’m getting down on myself about it all the time. One “episode” can turn what was my fantastic day into complete misery. I feel like an awful mom.

I know it’ll get better. I know it’s partly her age and mostly an adjustment to her baby sister. She’s not this way with her dad…or anyone else for that matter and it didn’t really start until it was just the girls & I home for that week Andy was back at work and I wasn’t yet. I’m sure it’s not easy all of a sudden becoming “second”.

I’m struggling.

I’m trying to put her first more often. I’m trying to get some one-on-one time with her. I’m trying to say yes more.

But it’s hard…so hard. She’s doing this all for attention. I’ve tried reinforcing positive behavior. I’ve tried punishing the negative behavior. It doesn’t seem like either works. It’s like it’s an awful downward spiral that I’m trying {not very successfully} to claw my way back up from.

I wish there was a set-in-stone-sure-fire-black-and-white way to fix this.

I’m thankful she’s not taking things out on Reese, but this behavior hurts my heart. I love her something fierce and I always will, but I miss where my girl and me were just a few months ago.

This parenting gig is tough sometimes.