Category Archives: Kind of Crazy

Things to NOT say/do to a pregnant lady…

This pregnancy isn’t my first rodeo, yet people still blow my mind {and not in a good way}. I remember when I was pregnant with Reese, our office was celebrating the month’s birthdays with cake and a coworker made a joke about how it looked like I didn’t need any cake.

Umexcusemewhat!?

Over the course of the last 7 years, I’ve grown 3 kids, been around a number of pregnant ladies, and learned a thing or two about what you should, more like shouldn’t, say to a pregnant lady.

Feel free to consider this a Public Service Announcement from pregnant women everywhere.

After not seeing her for a week or more, do NOT awkwardly bend over and look at her belly close-up, wide-eyed in wonder and amazement and say “woooooow!

After she jokingly reprimands you for the previous comment do NOT say, “I can’t help it, you’re just getting SO BIG!”

After she not-so-jokinlgy reprimands you for that previous comment, do NOT say, “Is it twins!?”

After she responds that she’s walking away from you now before she says something that wouldn’t be very nice, do NOT shout down the hallway, “was it something I said!?”

Pro tip: pregnant ladies already feel large and in-charge…and not in the sexy domineering way…they don’t need to be reminded that they’re gaining weight by the minute. Do not ever, under any circumstances make any comment about anything other than how beautiful she looks. Period. Because if not? They may get “irritable“.

And yes, the aforementioned conversation actually happened.

29 weeks, tomorrow. Only 11 weeks left of stupid comments.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to eat my feelings. They taste like cookies.

Today…

Today is brought to you by the letters TGIM and the number 3.

TGIM…as in THANK GOODNESS IT’S MONDAY. Like for reals. This weekend mang. Andy was hard at work on the patio. It’s getting so close! Rylee’s pneumonia relapsed on Thursday so we spent the weekend trying to take it easy. Nope, no fireworks or BBQs for us this year. Reese is hitting the two’s like a champ and both the girls are all sorts of opinionated when it comes to what is “theirs” and how they feel about sharing and how things just aren’t fair. Exhausting, yo.

So yes, TGIM!

And the number 3…as in just spent a 3 day weekend essentially solo-parenting two kids with crazy cabin fever by the end of day 3. As in just looked at my pregnancy app and apparently there’s less than 3 months until baby #3 is due to arrive. Wait, what!? As in I’ve already had 3 cups of coffee today.

And as in…3 days until I kiss my family goodbye and head off to a long weekend with 3 of my best gals.

Pregnancy with a side of irritability

I’ve noticed something throughout this pregnancy that’s markedly different than my previous two. I’m kind of a grumpy bitch. I’m pretty sure others have taken notice as well. For the most part, I do try and keep a sense of humor about things but sometimes that doesn’t always work out. After examining this further, I’ve found certain things that set me off and being the nice, helpful lady I am, I’m sharing it here with you.

  • I’m Hungry. I eat. A lot. When I don’t? I straight turn into Rosanne Barr in that Snickers commercial…pretty much a grumpy, whiney bitch. Is dinner planned for 6:30? I’m planning on eating at 6:30…6:45 may be pushing it, but I’ll still likely be fine. 7 PM? Nope. Too far gone. Quick, give me a granola bar or a string cheese or something.
  • I’m hot. It’s summer time. Temperatures are rising. There is nothing worse than boob sweat. And butt sweat. And thigh sweat. And back sweat. I think you get the idea here. I’m doing my best to stay hydrated/wear breathable clothing but sometimes that just isn’t enough. If I’m hot? I’m not particularly happy.
  • I’m exhausted. What time did you wake up this morning? Me? I was up at 5:20 am. Just like every other weekday. Weekends? If I get to sleep until 6 AM I consider it sleeping in. And that pre-6 AM wake up is AFTER waking up a number of times throughout the night for various reasons. For example, just the other night I was up…2 times to pee, 1 time with Reese, 2 times with Rylee because of an itchy bug bite then again because of a bad dream, then throw in another 2-3 times for uncomfortable tossing and turning courtesy of a growing belly that keeps getting in the way. This is after a full day of work and household chores and chasing kids and waking up at 5:30 am. And so the cycle goes…
  • My kids are ganging up on me. Most of the time, my kids are pretty awesome. They are very well behaved but every so often? notsomuch. Ry decides to turn on the sass. Um, excuse me? Did you just roll your eyes at me? Aw hell noReese if I you tell me one.more.time. that you have to go potty and I take you to the disgusting, stinky port-potty and you don’t go? I’m gonna lose it. RYLEE HOW ANY TIMES DO I NEED TO TELL YOU TO GET DRESSED!? Then of course let’s not forget Reese is almost two. So there’s that.
  • I’m out of my element. Consider where I am and who I am with. Out in the woods near a campfire and/or rushing body of water trying to keep my kids from dying? At a TBall game trying to watch one kid play while keeping the other kid entertained yet not annoying this shit out of everyone around us? At a busy park making sure my kids don’t face plant off a high slide or throw sand in another kid’s face? At church trying to keep kids quiet? Basically, anything other than being at home, work, or the grocery store and I am considering it out of my element. Times all of that by a billion if I’m doing it solo without my husband.
  • I’m sick of all the noise. My kid shaking a pasta box once or twice and thinking it’s funny? Ok, fine. 3-5 times? Pushing it. 5+ times? JUST GIVE ME THE EVER LOVING BOX ALREADY! Any kind of repetitive noise? Nope. I’m done. Music? Sure…as long as it’s music I like, but even then by about 7:30 at night I’m over it. Turn it off. Constant white noise of a fan? If you must. {The one exception? Giggles. Genuine little kid giggles are always ok.}
  • People are questioning my state of mind. Is Katherine ok? She seems irritable. OF COURSE I’M OK! Keep asking and the answer will quickly be no. Back up off me. And if you even think about telling me to “enjoy every moment”? I will lose it. Guaranteed.

Look, I’m 26 weeks pregnant. I’m chasing two other kids around. I automatically start at a higher level of irritability than most people just because of those two things. So…if I seem irritable? It’s probably because I am! And said irritability correlates directly with the number of irritants that are in play. The more irritants? The more red-faced, short tempered I get. And it can go from zero to raging in about two seconds. Overall my patience level starts at a negative number most days.

Maybe this whole post got a little ranty, but guess who doesn’t actually care? This girl.

So if you see me, or any other pregnant lady for that matter, seem a little “off” on the 4th of July, yes…chances are we’re probably irritable because we’re hot, hungry, tired and trying to keep our kids from blowing their faces off with fireworks. Whatever you do…do NOT ask us if everything is “ok”.

You’ve been warned.

Oh boy!

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The day Rylee found out we were going to have another baby she was clear she wanted a brother. This whole time I’ve been sure that this will would be another girl.

The other night Rylee was trying to convince me to let her skip school and come with us to the ultrasound. We stuck to our guns and told her we would think of a fun way to tell her tonight before her tball game.

It was all a little rushed and not exactly pinterest-worthy but so indicative of where we are at as a family right now. And so…

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So yep. We’re having a boy!

I have no words. We are over the moon. Today was an amazing day. And Andy’s birthday to boot.

Yep. A good day indeed.

10 minute update

It’s not even 9 pm and I’m ready to pass out. The crazy thing is I’m the only one awake right now. The quiet does things to my mind. Like sometimes makes me want to tap out a quick post from my phone. I love the quiet. I crave the quiet.

Ry has her first tball game tomorrow night. Her uniform is tye-died. Go figure. She seriously loves it. Double go figure. It’s supposed to be almost 80 degrees. Heck. Yes. I’ll report back later on how the game went and how the season has gone so far. That’s a post for when I’m at a computer.

Reese is Reese. Kicking butt with talking and continuing to blow my mind with early potty training.

Andy has begun turning the brick building next to our house into a workshop for himself. We call it the brick house because it is the original home/milking house on the property and well, it’s made a brick. It’s previously just been a catch all for our outdoor shit. He’s pretty excited about it and I’m happy he will have a space to tinker/build. I’m now just wondering why we didn’t do it sooner. I foresee him spending many hours in there…especially if baby number three is another girl. Ha.

I’m good. Just…tired. And my 10 minutes is up.

No one in our house slept worth a damn last night. Here’s hoping tonight is better!

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