I’m Fine.

by katherine on August 9, 2012

There’s this little fact that when someone asks “how are you doing” that most times, they really don’t actually care.

These days, I’m getting that question a lot. My standard answer? I’m fine.

And while I’m sure that annoys some of the askers, I’m pretty sure no one wants to hear…

That I’m running on sleep that comes in increments of 1.5-2 hours at a time.

That I’m so out of it sometimes that I’m wearing a pink elastic hair band on my wrist(s) to remind me which side I need to feed on next.

That I’m completely self conscious of the “headlight effect” happening courtesy of my nursing pads.

That it’s driving me crazy that what shushing/singing/swaying/swaddling tactics work one time to get Reese to sleep well completely fail the next time around.

That my wedding ring & engagement ring still don’t fit right.

That I feel like a freaking dairy cow because I’m nursing every 1-3 hours, depending on the day.

That there’s times I fear my nipples may get ripped off due to the thrashing around of a certain three-week-old.

That I’m completely sick of wearing absorbent anything in my chonies.

That my hair is falling out like whoa and if I didn’t have such think hair, I’d be afraid I were going bald.

That I swear I’m in a constant state of stank…and can’t figure out exactly why.

That I can’t button a single pair of pants.

That some of my pants I can’t even get over my ass.

That I sweat…a lot…like a gross amount. For no reason.

That I feel like a complete jerk of a wife because Andy is doing way, WAY more than his share around the house.

That I feel like an even bigger jerk of a mom because Rylee is taking the back seat to baby sister.

I mean really…would you really want to hear all that?

Yea, didn’t think so.

So see? When you ask me how I’m doing? I’m fine.

But, here’s the deal…the way I see it, all of this just comes with the territory of having a newborn.

And holding this sweet girl in my arms, makes it all worth it.

Oh, and I do get to shower daily, so there’s that…

{ 7 comments… read them below or add one }

1 laurapayette August 9, 2012 at 12:10 pm

Oh, the sweating. I hate it, too. I'm 12 weeks postpartum and still sweating up a storm. All. day. long. It leads to the "constant state of stank." Ick. The broken sleep? Right there with you. Can't button my pre-preggo pants either, although I can finally at least fit some over my hips/butt. Not that I'd dream of wearing them in public anywhere. I've got to lose the last 5-10 lbs. before that happens, and the weight is falling off…not at all. But, yes, the baby smiles and coos are so worth it.

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2 Karey August 9, 2012 at 12:43 pm

I'm pretty sure I had a similar post at around the three week mark not too long ago. Like the previous commenter said… I'm 11 weeks postpartum and I'm still sweaty. Still tired. Still can't button a number of my pants (well, I'm squeezing into my "fat pants" which might very well be even worse). Jeff is still doing way more than he "should" be around here. Sometimes my older kids still think I "like the baby more" (don't even get me started on how horrible that one makes me feel). But it's getting better. Every day it gets a little better. You know that – you've done this all before.

Hang in there, Mama. Just hang in there!

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3 ann @ my life as prose. August 9, 2012 at 1:11 pm

feel you so bad right now. we’re just kinda hanging in there ourselves, waiting for colic & unpredictable inconsolable fits to wane.

hang in there, friend.

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4 Tracy August 9, 2012 at 4:42 pm

I can't wait to give you a big squishy hug next month!

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5 Erin August 9, 2012 at 10:07 pm

Hang in there, indeed. Had my second (I have two boys, you see them on Instagram ;) six months ago and the first 6 weeks or so were BRUTAL this time around. I couldn't believe how much harder having two felt to me. How sucky the recovery was, how crappy it felt to not be able to pay as much attention to my first born, how TIRED I was. I loved having a newborn again in many ways, but looking back, that time was just not that enjoyable for me this time.

But as the weeks wore on, things got so, so much better and now life is AWESOME. We're in a groove and having two is so fun. All this is so temporary – which I know you know, but it still helps to hear it sometimes!

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6 Juli August 10, 2012 at 3:26 pm

Adding another child to the family when there already is one is a whole new ball game! You aren't feeling any differently then any of the other millions of women have felt around the world. Trust me, I have 3, you feel even worse when you have 3 but after 14 years (cause that's how old my youngest now is) you look back and it was all worth it!!! This too shall pass. 3 weeks – wow so much more to go through but so much fun ahead!! Enjoy all of it – even the sweating :-) Hugs to all of you!!!

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7 Bethanygp August 13, 2012 at 4:04 pm

You speak truth, mama. It’s rough.

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